silent chapter.

by e

it’s been a mind boogling month….

i’m not one who does daily reflections…but i admit i’m quite the deep thinker (not a good thing sometimes) and i’ve been thinking about this month…

I have not spoken much lately – words seem to be a precious commodity nowadays…
not that i’m very bothered by the fact that i’m silent more often, but rather i’m grieved that my loved ones are telling me that i have not been talking to them.

my reason (which really doesn’t justify why) is that if I don’t have much to say, I won’t say anything at all….

not that i’m giving any form of silent treatment to anyone… it just seems like the once talkative me is silent for the moment… i can’t explain why either, it just seems like i can’t find the words to say nothing, anymore.

my once overflowing bag of words are reduced to a meager heap of nouns and verbs… with such a limited stock of words… it hard to hold a substantive conversation of length.

and so this season is like a silent chapter, flip a page and find it blank.

i’m empty Lord…. fill me up again…

i’m a blank canvas waiting to be painted.
a blank page awaiting poetry, and stories…
a clear sky tarrying for clouds to form their fluffy sculptures…

~~~~~~~~~~

and so i’ll plant whatever words i have left in you… (:

i’ll just put that lil mustard seed of words into your hand.. grow a fruitful vine out of it daddy…

emo and deep thoughts aside… i’m just pleasantly glad… life isn’t so bad after all and i’m really life the good life.. well somehow it is…

long walks back home when it’s dark has been really lovely.. it’s funny how i link the unearthy hours to adventure camp… i did a spin and another looking at the stars… it’s fun to just be a boy and be in wonder…

i like what Desmond prayed over me during cg… in essence I knew daddyGod was gently whispering..

remain child-like imm.

i guess it’s when i stop walking straight and standing tall and just hop and run and spin like a kid. that’s when the words will inevitably return…

who said that being 20 means i have to start growing old? I’ve cheated myself. ha.

i guess that’s, that. time to play in the rain of daddy’s Grace…. time to be soaked, who cares about the circumstances…

believing is hard sometimes… well playing isn’t.. I’ll play. (:

(i may not make much sense.. but i’m happy – that settles it. *grins*)

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